So I made a mistake…
But first some good news.
After what felt like forever, I was finally able to get another job. And the best part is that it includes A/C.
Gone are the days of sweating out my entire body mass at work.
Gone are the days of splashing plant juice on myself and walking into spider webs.
Gone are the days of having to shuck and jive dozens of heavy-ass plant carts back and forth.
If I haven’t made it clear before now, it sucked.
All that aside, like so many big moments in life, they never really feel significant when you're living them.
I was eating lunch with my girlfriend when I got the email.
Despite all of the reject emails I’ve gotten in the past hardening my heart, I still held my breath as I opened it.
I scanned it quickly.
Looking for the usual suspects of a rejection email:
“We appreciate you…”
or
“At this time…”
All things I’ve read so many times before.
Instead, I was met with an unfamiliar warmth. It didn’t read like your typical frigid corporate email. I could tell an actual person wrote it.
That’s when I let my guard down and actually read the email.
And by the second sentence, so many of the scars I had from previous rejections healed immediately.
Finally, someone believed in me…
Mind you, this isn’t some incredible internship or an entry-level position at a famous company.
It’s a job at the mall.
Taking A Step Back
My past self would have never imagined pining for such a role. But here we are.
All those high and mighty expectations I had have disintegrated.
It’s not that I’ll be satisfied with being a retail associate or that it’ll be the peak of my career because, of course, it won’t.
I’m just saying I’m much more appreciative of the little things now.
It’s so important to find little things to be grateful for when it feels like the big things are on hold.
I’ve nearly driven myself crazy several times from focusing on everything I’m unsatisfied with right now.
At this point, I just see it as a waste of energy. Instead, I’m trying to direct my attention to things that give me a little peace: my writing, my reading, and my loved ones.
Speaking of time…
Happy Accidents
I accidentally gave myself a week’s vacation.
Somehow, despite reading the fated acceptance email several different times, I read the start date wrong.
Every.
Single.
Time.
It was only on the morning of my pseudo-first day did I finally read the correct date.
At first, I felt pretty dumb and spent the rest of the morning beating myself up over the mistake.
Eventually, though, I licked my wounds and saw the situation as a well-needed vacation.
Weeks before, I had been saying that I needed some kind of vacation. And God was looking out for me I guess.
I feel like my body is accustomed to having a summer vacation after all those years in school. But as I got older, the opportunity to actually go one was an afterthought.
I won’t be going on any fancy vacations in that time, but it will serve as a nice buffer between one job and another.
As I said, it’s not the perfect job, but its a little better and I needed a win. Big or small.
Here’s to happy accidents and little wins. Hope y’all have a good week.
Thanks for reading xx
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congratulations on the new job!
i think i felt this way at the start of the pandemic. all my plans were thrown away and i had to take a step back, breathe, and keep a mantra that life is not a race or that life doesn't have a blueprint. (even if i did have a blueprint for my life)
i realized that life, like everything else, is made up of the little things. it made me think of the most basic and simple thing i could, and be thankful for that.
it made me find insignificance in labels. career wise, i don't think i'll remember any of my labels/positions (even my current one I still forget sometimes). i remember more on what king of work i did, what i learned, what i discovered, who i met. i think those are the most important aspects. and of couse whether you enjoy or find purpose in what you do.